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Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Early Morning Musings

I used to write in my journal every day. Especially when I was going though some of the most difficult times in my life. A Writing workshop I took suggested going to the computer and "fishing" - just start writing and see what comes out of it. So that's what I'm doing this morning. Fishing for thoughts. It's raining outside. Not a torrential downpour, but a steady rain that shows no stopping any time soon.  Not like in Phoenix where the skies would shake with thunder and lightening and produce 5 minutes worth of rain. Hardly worth all the trouble. Not here. Rain can last all day, or several days. And then the sun is so welcome. I know this sounds crazy but in Phoenix I craved the rain. Sometimes I'd get up in the morning and pull back the curtain and say "darn, sunshine again."

Where is all this leading? I don't know. As I've done so many times before I am putting one foot in front of the other and walking down this path that is my life. And a good life it is and has been. I have to say that I am happy with the life we've made for ourselves, my husband and I. It's had its rough spots like most people but we've traveled it together side by side, supporting each other, loving each other. Exploring, navigating, learning. Now we are in the process of planning our 3 month Irish Adventure. And it is so exciting. What will it bring? How will it change us? I asked myself that question before we went to live in Italy for two years in 2005. That was 9 years ago! Unbelievable that so much time has passed since we made that journey and lived and explored all those places. It took me a while to realize how it had changed me, what I had taken from that time. Confidence. In myself. In what I could do and be. In how I looked at the world with a fresh perspective. So what happens next? Where will my art go? What turns will it take, exposed to a new landscape, new cities, countryside, people?

I wrote a great deal in Italy. Will I do the same in Ireland? Perhaps. But this time I know it will be just for me. Not in hopes that my friends and family back home will follow along. Not many did then. Too busy with their own lives and work. But just to record it. So that, as I do now with my Italy blog, I look back, read about what we did, remember the places, the experiences, recorded for posterity. Because I know I would have forgotten so much. So I suppose I will blog about it. Maybe someone will read it, maybe not. But it doesn't matter. Because it is mine. For me and for Bob. And the words will pour out of me and I will take the rain and the sunshine as it comes and open myself up to new experiences, new possibilities.

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